Are you struggling secretly with porn and worried because you can’t seem to make any progress?
Before things spiral further out of control for you or someone you love, let’s dive into the reasons why watching porn is so addictive.
We’ll also give you proven ways to pro-actively fight back, so that you can break free for good. But don’t just take our word for it. We’ll include true success story links to inspire you to believe in yourself!
Table of Contents
Why Is Porn So Addictive?
The mega billion-dollar porn industry knows you – almost on a first name basis. They’ve studied all the best ways to hook you by tracking your online habits down to the times of day and types of porn you enjoy.
Then they tap into brain science to pleasure you in the worst possible ways. So unless you learn how to effectively unhook your brain from porn, you’ll always keep coming back for more.
Neurological and Physiological Reasons Porn Is Addictive
What is porn addiction and what does it do to you? Understanding how your brain chemistry is tied into your porn struggle can be empowering!
Your brain is full of tiny little chemical messengers called neurotransmitters. In a healthy person, these messengers, including dopamine, help your body feel pleasure and enjoyment.
Viewing porn overstimulates the pleasure centers of your brain, flooding it with excess amounts of dopamine.
Over time, habitual porn use messes up normal brain chemistry and creates addictive brain patterns which impact your mental and physical health.
“Dopamine has a direct impact on the central nervous system, which is made up of the brain and spinal cord.” ~ Very Well Mind
Psychological reasons you crave porn
So what does porn addiction do to you? Porn becomes the “medicine” your brain says you need to cope with stress and anxiety.
But — too much dopamine actually stresses you out long-term.
One of the negative effects of porn addiction is that it keeps you locked in a vicious mental cycle of craving instant gratification and then creating long-term stress to your body.
Social Factors
Watching porn has become the “new normal” in our culture, largely because porn and sexual content are only a few taps away on your smartphone. Even high school students share sexts and talk about OnlyFans and porn.
Why Can’t I Just Stop Watching Porn?
Porn Statista.com reports that one leading pornsite averaged 5.49 billion visits in May 2024! That’s a LOT of porn.
Recently the World Health Organization also listed compulsive porn use as behavioral addiction in the ICD-11.
New studies now link smartphone use to addictive behaviors. Symptoms include emotional dysregulation and impulsivity, also very common with porn use.
So imagine combining a porn addiction with an addictive smartphone that you carry with you everywhere!
It’s like an alcoholic trying to quit drinking while constantly carrying a bottle of whiskey everywhere.
Why Some People Are More Prone to Porn Dependence
Younger millennials and GenZ are especially prone to watch lots of porn. It’s understandable, since they’re the first generation raised with smartphones, tablets, and internet access on gaming devices.
Gooner Gaming Communities
Porn is commonly, easily, and frequently shared in Discord gaming communities. Some Discord communities actually tag themselves as a safe space for “gooners” – an urban term for masturbating to porn.
Internet Addiction Disorder, Porn Addiction, and ADHD
If you’re diagnosed with ADHD or are neurodivergent and struggle with impulse control, you’re more vulnerable than others to gaming, internet, and porn addiction.
Just like others experience, porn becomes your way of numbing yourself to deal with anxiety or stress.
But for people with ADHD, porn creates even more problems:
“growing consumption of internet pornography mainly in male ADHD population is closely related to compulsive sexual behavior and hypersexuality.”
Why Should I Stop Watching Porn?
Are you struggling with focus, emotional highs and lows, anxiety, and depression?
If you also watch porn regularly, you may actually be feeling the effects of a porn addiction.
A growing number of sex addiction therapists link porn use to other mental health issues.
Effects on Mental Health
Many report feeling deeply depressed due to their porn use for a variety of reasons. Are depression and anxiety actually effects of porn addiction?
Studies show that porn use often fuels anxiety by creating a poor self-image, messing up brain chemistry, and even contributing to suicidal ideations.
Above all, porn harms mental health, because porn is the worst role model for relationships.
Impact of porn on relationships
“Love gives. Lust takes.” ~ Joshua Broome
Porn is a destructive relationship parasite because it teaches:
- Selfishness
- Emotional and physical cheating
- Intimacy anorexia
- Unrealistic body or sexual performance expectations, aka, a “porn star wife”
- Sexual violence
Porn destroys the seven basic traits of a good friendship and “Golden Rule” values that promote love and happiness.
In the end, this lack of connection and happiness erodes motivation to chase worthwhile goals and dreams.
Influence on Personal Goals
Overall, poor mental health destroys your power to reach goals because porn use sucks away your time and healthy ambition. Some, like Rachael, say they walked around in a porn-induced “brainfog”.
Always craving the next porn scene can easily destroy your focus and productivity.
However, on a positive note, many in our Ever Accountable community, like Cole, say their mental health improves greatly when they quit porn.
How Do I Know If I Have a Problem to Porn - Interactive Self-Reflection
All the questions below show potential effects of porn addiction. Do any of these describe you?
Questions to Consider
- Do I feel unable to control my porn use?
- Is porn use affecting my relationships in a negative way?
- Do I turn down social activities in order to watch porn?
- Is porn use interfering with my work or home responsibilities?
- Am I experiencing intense cravings for more porn?
- Do I feel stressed or anxious if I cannot access porn?
How To Overcome Your Porn Habit
Every hero’s story starts with a moment of clarity. “I have a problem. And no one can fix this problem but me.”
Acknowledge the issue
If you’ve answered the questions about porn addiction symptoms honestly, you’re ready to take action!
Every single success story we hear at Ever Accountable starts with a person who recognizes that porn is a problem in their life.
They stop justifying, rationalizing, or minimizing their porn use.
Next, they start taking bold steps to conquer this problem.
Set clear, achievable goals
To get rid of a compulsive porn habit, a radical change of daily routine is needed.
- First, get rid of all your access to porn.
- Get accountable for your actions. Talk to someone you trust and ask them to help you meet your goal of a porn-free life.
- Make a daily plan and write it down. Ask yourself when and where do I watch porn? Our Habit Tracker can help you identify some potential weak spots in your daily routine.
Identify and manage triggers
Why do you watch porn? Were you lonely, stressed after hard days’ work, or going through something tough in your family? Mental health specialists call the underlying reasons “triggers”.
Learning about your personal porn triggers helps you plan to make positive choices ahead of time!
Coping mechanisms that help
When you connect a dopamine rush with natural pleasure instead of porn, you can rewire your brain over time.
Finding healthier coping mechanisms that you enjoy and will practice is key.
To deal with hard days and hard moments, mindfulness techniques help many such as:
- Journaling about your wins and weak moments
- Meditation and positive affirmations
- Talk therapy
- Yoga and breathing exercises
- Calling a trusted friend
- Getting out in nature
Improving little habits helps you reset and relax naturally.
Taking online porn recovery courses like Ascend can inspire you to quit porn and increase your confidence.
Implement practical steps
Limit access by setting online boundaries
Since most porn is streamed online, you need to set up strict online boundaries. Porn accountability software is a highly effective way to quit porn.
Knowing someone who cares about you will see all of your online activity, immediately makes you think twice about viewing porn.
In fact, 95% of people who use Ever Accountable see an immediate drastic reduction in their porn use for this reason, while 63% quit porn all the way after installing our software.
Some also use porn blocking software as an added layer of protection.
You can’t fight porn alone and unprotected!
Establish healthy routines
Be sure to add good things to your life to fill up the empty time and space in your life.
- Exercise and outdoor activities help stimulate healthy brain chemicals and a healthy body as well.
- Taking a screentime break is also highly effective to help reset your brain chemistry. California psychiatrist Dr. Cameron Sepah calls this a dopamine “reset” (not a dopamine fast). Plan to fill that time with simple activities that bring pleasure. And, hey, it’s actually good to feel a little bored sometimes.
- Consider eating healthy foods rich in the amino acid tyrosine like chicken, dairy, avocados, pumpkin and sesame seeds, bananas, and soy could help boost your dopamine levels naturally.
Practice mindfulness to boost recovery
Mindfulness involves practicing ways to settle, soothe, and “parent” your mind to bring it under control.
Meditation
For people of faith, meditation on Scriptures and their relationship with God every day strengthens and empowers them to face challenges.
Practices like repeating positive affirmations to train your mind to focus on good things.
Science shows that meditation is healing.
“Levels of dopamine (the neurotransmitter of pleasure), serotonin (the neurotransmitter of happiness), and GABA (the neurotransmitter of calmness) all rise in response to meditation.” ~ Stanfordmag.org
Yoga
Whether you prefer hot yoga or simple yoga poses, it’s “a tried and true path to calm your mind and soul mindfully.”
Yoga is especially helpful for easing depression from compulsive porn use or the porn withdrawal process.
Seek Support
“To people who are starting down the road to freedom …community is never optional in the journey to freedom.” Brad
Talk to someone
Like many, you may fear shame or rejection if you share that you’re struggling with porn. However, more damage is done if your secret is discovered before you tell someone, says therapist Jason VanRuler, author of Get Past Your Past.
Asking someone you trust to be your accountability partner frees you to move forward! A good accountability partner(s) will motivate you to reach your goals and encourage you to keep going even when you slip-up.
Support groups
Online or in-person porn recovery communities are a key recovery tool for most. Groups like Live Free provide a non-judgemental place where you can share experiences and receive encouragement from others facing similar challenges.
“Much to my surprise, instead of others running away when I shared the ugly parts of myself, they embraced me with love, and encouraged me to keep sharing and growing.
Quitting porn taught me the importance of having other men in my life with whom I could be vulnerable!” – Ken
Professional help
If you see signs of possible porn addiction in your life, a certified sex addiction therapist can help speed up your porn recovery process.
Understanding Relapse and Persistence
Sheer willpower isn’t enough to quit due porn’s addictive effects. A realistic mindset helps. Look at the porn recovery process as a marathon, not a short sprint.
Expect challenges
Porn trains you to expect instant gratification. Instead, think of quitting porn like running a marathon.
You might stumble, sweat buckets, or even puke your guts out, but if you just keep going, you’ll cross the finish line.
Develop resilience, persistence, and antifragility
“Don’t give up. It will be hard. My road to freedom has lasted two decades, and it’s still a road I’m traveling.” – Brad
Being resilient and bouncing back from any slip-ups or even a porn relapse is vital.
Another important mindset to develop is antifragility.
Antifragility involves choices, as Psychology Today explains:“Developing an antifragile mindset doesn’t mean denying feelings of anxiety and stress, but instead, training ourselves to summon the opposite responses.”
Conclusion
Even though dealing with the effects of a porn addiction may be a tough battle mentally, physically, and emotionally, you are not alone. You’ve got a lot of company in this huge marathon race to quit porn.
With proper gear (accountability software), support, and commitment, we know you can make it across the finish line.
We’re cheering for your success.
Have a porn recovery success story you’d like to share to encourage others? Please drop us a line: marketing@everaccountable.com
*Ever Accountable’s blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or therapy, though we often link to medically reviewed studies.
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